We've been hosting a small group in our house for almost a year now. It's a Family Life Home Builders group. We're in the midst of our second group and it's going great. It's a small group designed to improve your marriage. There are eight of us total, and amazingly, all four couples are in interracial marriages. Our cultural differences are often obvious and hilarious--sometimes frustrating and persistent. It's wonderful to get together and talk, laugh and learn about them.
One of the biggest concepts we learned at the Family Life conference we went to last year was about serving your spouse. The world looks at a marriage as a 50/50 relationship. But we as Christ-servers must look at our marriage as a 100/0 relationship. So often we hold an imaginary scoreboard up on the living room wall and check off each job we do. Then we look at the other side and hold condemnation over our spouse if they aren't "doing their half". But God asks us to love and respect... period. There were no stipulations. So if Kenneth never did another thing that I expected him to, I would still need to love him as Christ did. Try swallowing that concept! It's hard to admit that we have a measuring rod we put our spouses up to... especially when we're supposed to know better. It's called "unconditional" love for a reason.
Hosting this group has been so good for us. Kenneth has demonstrated the 100/0 every day since I became pregnant. He's taken on jobs he typically does, along with all the ones I typically did. And he's done it with such a servant's attitude. I'm so grateful and proud of my husband!