Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Being Mom

I'm really beginning to enjoy her now. It took me about 7 or 8 weeks to really recover emotionally from the birth. Now she's three months and becoming a lot more interactive--and more fun. I still don't feel like a "mom", but hey, how do you know what that feels like? I still can't get over how much longer it takes to do everything--even a simple trip to the grocery store, or planning to call someone "right back." At first I would get frustrated because I'm so focused and accomplishment driven. I'm starting to learn that my drive is a handicap as much as it is a blessing. We were reading earlier in "Deadly Viper Character Assassins" about the assassin of the Headless Sprinting Chicken. I'm learning that balance is bunk. Trying to do everything and be everything is impossible and unhealthy. But apathy is not an option. It's important to me to take advantage of every day, and not let opportunities to learn, grow, change, clean up, etc pass by. Wisdom knows the difference. And Selah has helped me knock that assassin down a notch or two. She has certainly taught me to stop and spend more time on the 1st priority things... and let all the 2nd priority things pile up in the sink.

8 comments:

Thea0 said...

7 or 8 weeks - you're awesome! It took me a year and a half and a VBAC to really heal over mine...it's a process for sure. Has she laughed yet? I forget when that happens but it's like music when it does....I can't wait! I love this post - it mirrors so much of my own internal processing. It's amazing what a little growing up will do for your perspective on "first priority things" ...I'm still working on it all...I think I will still be "working on it" when I die. :)

Hope Clark said...

Thanks Thea! :) Yes, it certainly is a process. By "emotionally recover from the birth" I mean I'm not crying about it anymore. I still remember, and never want to go back through it again. But I'm also amazed at how good God is to give us bodies and emotions that He can heal and restore. Next I'm waiting for Him to remove my battlescar (c-section scar). I figure He has the ability and I want it gone!

She hasn't laughed yet, but she's getting really close. She coos and rambles nonsense all the time. I'm so looking forward to the laugh. :)

Joseph said...

Welcome to the world of parenthood. Enjoy it. Each season passes quicker than you realize and before you know it they're ready for college... gulp!!!

kenneth said...

you're doing an incredible job! i know cause..... i have an up close view.

Thea said...

I hear you...I remember. You have a keen sense of perspective and such a gift of wisdom. I admire your ability to use the two together - so 8 weeks wouldn't surprise me for you :) As for college - I may need counseling when that day comes. I get teary over putting away baby clothes that don't fit anymore. My heart is just not big enough to hold the love I have for my girls, and I'm just getting started.

Thea said...

Girl, how do you get music on your page?? I love it - I decided to join the blogger world but I have to at least start out kind of on the right foot :) Much gras for the help!

Hope Clark said...

Thanks Kenneth!! :)

Thea,
Adding music is not that hard. You just have to join a music website. (I use Imeem.) Takes two seconds to register. Then you can copy and paste the embeded music of your choice into a new page element. After you log into blogger, just go to the Help section and they tell you how to do it. You're going to be a great blogger!!

Thea said...

thanks girl :)