Psalm 143 has been my prayer for months now. I just didn't know it.
I read it this morning in my quiet time and realized that those words are the ones I've been praying for a while now. "Teach me the way in which I should walk; for to Thee I lift up my soul." Still, I think my prayer is born out of a desperation to not fail Him, to make Him proud... instead of a desperation to know Him and love Him more.
It's the thoughts that betray me. I believe He can--but will He? I must spend enough time with Him. I wonder, will worship go well this Sunday... or won't it? Instead of thinking, I love Him so much and desire more. I trust Him completely and rest in the joy that His peace brings.
It all starts with my foundational--perhaps subconscious--belief. It's the answer to the question: Is my salvation brought about by myself and God, or by God alone? I must think it's by myself and God, for I'm ever striving to please Him. I must learn to let go and just love Him.