A few years ago I would have gasped at the thought of my car being repossessed.
But now times are hard. It's amazing the things today that we take with a grain of salt that, a few years ago, we would have been aghast at. "Oh my, I would never pay a bill late! I'm responsible with my money"... has turned into "Well, which bill should we try to pay this month?"... and "How late can it go until it hits our credit?"... to "What credit?"
Don't worry. We're fine.
We now have two friends who have lost their cars to repossession. Multiple friends who have lost their houses to foreclosure. And it's actually exciting when another low-cost, expired items, grocery outlet opens near you. For Pete's sake Girlfriend, shoppin' at Wal-Mart is a luxury.
So, with that in mind... and the joy of the Lord abounding in my heart... I decided to write a top five list for a feisty friend of mine. She was having a VERY rough day the other day. (My feisty friend is a New Yorker and has beauty, joy, and moxy oozing out of her.)
So, if you feel the financial pressure, then give a shout out. And enjoy these top five...
Shawneequa's top five ways of responding to bill collector calls when they ask her where all her money is going:
5. Mock static, say "Hello? Hello?... *kshhhhhh*.... I can't hear you...." Then hang up.
4. When they call back, answer the phone with, "China Town Cafe, dis Kiki, may I hep you?"
3. Demand to speak with their supervisor, then leave them on hold.
2. Throw the phone down and run around the room screaming, "Oh my God! They're here to get me! The world is ending!"
... and the number one way to deal with bill collectors when they call asking where your money is going....
1. "My pimp took it. Yeah, I said it. My pimp took it."