It's been almost two weeks since the miscarriage.
I feel a lot better physically. The drugs after the D&C made me cramp a lot. But now, I feel physically back to my old self. Emotionally, I'm not there yet. The huge dramatic pendulum swing from content and accepting to disappointed and confused has calmed to a gentle drift back and forth. The hormones are dissipating, and with them goes the vaulting and cascading extremes of my mood.
I'm still asking myself, "What just happened?" I still feel bewildered and disoriented. I was on one track, then six weeks ago, my course changed direction suddenly. Then just as suddenly, I'm back on the first track. But there's so much going on around here that it often reigns my emotional wanderings and ponderings back into practical and purposeful activities.
We leave for Nepal in TWO WEEKS. :) I am incredibly excited about that. There is much planning to do. globalife journeys is taking it's first official trip and there's a lot to do on the back end in preparation for that. K is still unemployed and looking for a job and there's a lot to do to take care of our family on a daily and weekly basis.
Life moves on. And only His grace is enough for each day. Even though I may say it through tears today, I can still say that the journey is beautiful.